Sunday, October 2, 2016

Holding Up

I was having a think the other about how nice it is to look back at past posts. Facebook is doing that with its memory feature but I'm not so keen on spilling my thoughts and feelings out on there. And I mostly spill my thoughts on twitter but I don't want to torture my friends of having to listen to me endlessly complain, hahah. Plus, the 140-character limit doesn't allow me to practise the flow of writing that I need to desperately right now. And I'm usually too lazy to commit to a physical journal.

SO, I've decided to come back to blogging because it'd be interesting to see how my thoughts have developed over the years and to see what I'm currently going through as comparison. I figured that it would be a creative and healthier outlet for when my stress levels get out of hand, so I'm seeing through this on whether it helps or not.

Anyway, I'm in my final year of my degree now (crazy how time flies!) Doing my thesis whilst taking 5 other subjects - due to this I have about 12 assignments to complete this semester; WAY more than I'm used to - and I don't seem to be reacting well to that. I'm about 6 weeks into my semester and it's been SUCH a hell of a rollercoaster ride. My emotions have been doing 180 turns every other day, my sanity doing front flips and back, and my mind flooded with never-ending to-do lists.

So. Yeah. I'm trying to find healthier alternatives to coping as the built up of anxiety I experience can get a bit too much (and they're no fun at all).

I've been successful, so far, in my attempts at finding a balance between everything. Deadlines are looming around the corner, but I'm still making time for enough rest and doing things that I enjoy, like crafting and watching youtube videos! Lol

Friday, February 27, 2015

Embracing change

So much for regularity on this blog! Two months just past within a blink of an eye!!

I've been going through a lot of changes, especially within this month. Just as I had gotten over being homesick, I was finally drowned with enough assignments and tests to create the right amount of stress to distract me. I also had been hanging out with my friends a lot and bonded more and more with them.

Then the day we'd all been waiting for finally came!! The day my boyfriend arrived! That was something. Long distance really makes the heart grow fonder, as they say. We were just talking about this and it's crazy to think that half a year of our relationship was long distance. Skype is cool and all, but physical contact and face to face conversations can't ever be topped.

I've been spending so much time with him and catching up that I'm still kinda in awe that he's finally here. It's a strange, but pleasant, kind of change to adapt to -- all the commuting, flexibility of time, and basically just being in control of doing whatever we want whenever we want. One important thing we've learned is that it can get a bit much when you spend too much time with someone, despite being with them for a long time because you learn all these weird and personal things about each other that you'd never expect -- and that's good, but humans are social creatures and we can't keep socialising with the same person for an extended period of time. Nevertheless, I still miss him deeply everytime we part (depsite meeting the next day again) (#clingylovers #itsjustmethough #notsorry).

While all of that is still happening, I'm trying to wrap my head around the fact that my friends are finally moving out, and so will I, but at a later date. I'm trying to comprehend how much we're progressing into being Responsible (trying very hard) Young Adults. We're going to have OUR OWN APARTMENTS. That is such a grown up thing. It's so weird. I'm sorry. I'm still trying to understand it. That being said, I'm going to miss the late nights and complaining about our current living place and day dreaming of the perfect apartment and coming back from uni together and going out for our dinners and hanging out in each others rooms and meeting new people and so, so many more things.

It's like chapter after chapter after chapter, new new new, adapt adapt adapt, change change change.

I guess I've always been fond of changes, especially since they've been thrown at me constantly since I graduated from A levels, but once it happens I would quiver and fear the change itself and would want to go back to the comfortable ol' life. However, I've tried to accept these changes and march against them with full force, facing them upfront. I get a tingly, nostalgic feeling and I get sad and look back at the good times. It's been quite a challenge to think of the good things that come out of the future and to embrace the uncentertainty that may come with it. It's still quite early in the year of 2015, so I might as well get used to it. Here's to more changes!

Sunday, December 21, 2014

I'm back!

The last time I've checked in here was about 10 months ago, so crazy! I was reading back my posts and it feels like all those things happened forever ago!! I have gone through an insane amount of changes, growing up, figuring stuff out, etc.

For those of you who have been following me for a while and kept up with me: I'm finally in university now!!! Yay!!! Hence the reason for my being MIA. Also, I had been busy with working and doing attachment jobs and creating new memories and experiences with people around me in this little place before I left.

I've started taking pictures again, very recently, because I felt like I wanted to get back into it.

This was practically my life the past 4 months, lol!

And now I'm back home for a little semester break! It's nice to finally have a breath of fresh air, far away from the polluted air, haze and busy roads. A little peace, quiet and blue skies to look up to, you know?

I went out and catched up with my cousins last weekend. We went to an amusement park that just revamped itself -- really felt like childhood again!

My boyfriend and I have been spending a lot of time together too, which is great. We did our favourite pastime a couple days ago: go to the beach and do some adventuring.

We found a couple of huts too! Someone built them, which we appreciated SO much at the time because the weather was blazing hot!!!! Like, we took selfies, and our faces looked baked and roasted AND fried all at the same time. Insane. I really needed the burn though! Haven't felt that typa way in a while.

Being in a city is fun and I enjoy it a lot. Everything's fast, there are constantly people around, it's always noisy and you can walk everywhere. But I hold the beach really close to my heart, and I've had many, many great times there. I've missed the sound of the breeze plugging into my ears, and the sund of the waves crashing in nearby. The feeling of getting sand in my toes when I walk barefoot. I've missed the salty air blowing in my face, combining with my sweat leaving my skin sticky. And dipping my warm toes into the cool water. And the sunlight glaring into my eyes -- resulting in my eyes squinting all. the. damn. time. I've missed it all.

Til next time!


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